Epic Fail!

Wow, nothing makes a girl feel better than realizing she could fail as a human being if she isn't beautiful enough. It's bad enough that this so-called "beauty race" is haunting us in media and leaking into everyday life, but to read that there is scientific data arguing that the more beautiful we are the more successful our genes/the female half of the human race will be... Well, Fuck. That's a lot of pressure! Not only that, it makes me feel pretty average knowing that there are so many beautiful women out there competing with us for the male population which has, to put it bluntly, reached a stasis of attractiveness. Which is kind of our fault, isn't it? Thankfully, the female half of the population is less shallow than the male half. Only by a little.

What will this eventually mean? Maybe in the not-too-distant future we'll have a bitchin' hot and intelligent female population and we can rule the world like crazy sexy Amazon-esque women. A girl can dream!

So...

Did anyone else have that lesson in 3rd grade health class about proper hygiene and how to shower correctly? They taught us that you should start at your head and work down to your feet. You know, wash your hair and face before you wash your body. Sometimes, I get into the shower and I'm like, "Fuck that. I'm going to start with my feet and make my way UP!" Because it's all a conspiracy, right? It totally is. They brainwashed us into thinking that was the only correct way to shower! So, I get in the shower determined to show them how wrong they are. "I'm so going to do it this time!", I always tell myself. Fuck them!

I can never bring myself to do it. Because, what if they are right? Fuck!